A year of action?

'Tis that time of the year again...

When months of frenzy gives way to long and quiet days, festive lighting abounds on the streets, newspapers and news channels begin their ritual of posting annual retrospectives, the social circuit starts buzzing with activity...and of course, I end up being generally at a loss trying to find productive use for my existence!  Should I be catching up on my reading?  Clear up my clogged email inbox?  Go out and buy long pending stuff for the house?  Catch some movies?  Thoughts of reviving my blogging expectedly engage the brain... 

It has been many months since I last visited Vishesh Prarambh...in fact, the longest period of inactivity since I began writing a few years ago.  My own little sanctuary has become alien to me.  Try as I may, it is hard to revive a good habit once one has let go of it.  Such long stretches of literary inaction have other consequences...like casting doubts over one's ability of self-expression.  Empty thoughts swirl around in the brain and one feels that there is little of consequence to pen down. 

During a recent visit to Bangalore, a friend of mine asked me why I had not been writing.  My instinctive response was that this had been a year of action, rather than introspection and reflection.  Today, as I settled down on the couch with computer on lap, I decided to test the validity of that statement.  I did something I generally tend to avoid - looking back!  I leafed through the calendar to see what my year had really been like.  Turns out I was not too far off the mark. 

I had been on the road a lot.  Even after cancelling a few trips due to pressing matters at home.  All in all, within the past 12 months I made 19 trips to 10 different countries and spent over 21 weeks outside of Singapore!

So what about the 31 weeks that I was around, one might ask??  Well, those did not turn out to be that easy either...

For much of the year, I was leading a complex transformation program for a really large part of our business.  This required me to work with a whole host of people across Asia, Europe and the US - both virtually and in person.  We were ushering in a new era within our organisation, and I knew no other way to do that than to be with people as they navigated their way through the windy and often rough terrain of a change journey.  Also, a year ago I had been announced in a new global role, which I was getting increasingly impatient to take on.  So even before the transformation program had wound down, off I went to the US to assume my new responsibilities.  The result was not pretty on my (work?) life.  By the end of the year, I was on a round-the-clock schedule trying to keep pace with my colleagues, many of who reside in the opposite end of the world.  During a typical work week, I would start the day with conference calls at 9am and wrap up the last of my virtual meetings well past midnight.  I had forgotten a 'normal' existence that most people have...like having a meal without headphones wrapped around one's head staring at a computer screen!

As if all this was not enough, I had a serious issue to deal with at home.

On a Saturday morning in early September as I headed off to the gym for a session with my trainer, my wife had a bad accident with my dog, Kulfi, which resulted in her sustaining serious injuries (no fault of the dog really...it was her inexperience in dealing with a large animal in a particular situation).  Instantly, our domestic life turned on its head.  Over the next fortnight she was in and out of hospital and underwent surgical cleaning procedures under general anaesthesia five times.  For several weeks thereafter, she trotted about with a vacuum pressured contraption strapped to the wound on her arm.  In addition to her medical care, I needed to attend to my dog.  And take care of the house.  I called off work trips and hunkered down to focus on the home front - there were issues to resolve!  I began a new training program with my dog which took up a few hours every day.  I was fortunate to be referred to a fantastic trainer who started work with both of us and Kulfi to help build a new relationship between man and dog based on a new regimen, mutual trust and discipline. 

Meanwhile, the pace at work continued to be hectic...the incessant conference calls continued.

Several well wishers counseled me to reconsider having a large dog at home, given my travel intensive job which leaves my wife to manage Kulfi all by herself.  There is merit in that thought.  But the fact is that we both love our dog.  Even though we were severely tested, I felt the need to work through the situation rather than escape it.  Every relationship undergoes trying times...this one between man and canine was no different.  One accident ought not to deter us from setting things right.  While I could not predict the outcome, I owed it to myself, my wife, and the four legged creature we had brought into our home to do everything possible to make this a loving and harmonious relationship.  So I did the only thing I was capable of - trying hard.  Three months have passed and the effort seems to bear fruit - Kulfi is a happier dog, more responsive than he has ever been, and my wife and I are much better at understanding and managing him.  And so one shall continue to persevere...

As the year draws to a close and a new one rapidly looms on the horizon, I eventually find myself in reflection.  There is a defining thought in the conscience which is simple, yet powerful.  I believe it is a quote from John F. Kennedy...

"We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard."

May we all choose to do things because they are hard!

02.01.11

So I finally got a week off after months of frenzied activity.  The run up to Christmas had accorded me little time to plan a small getaway from Singapore...and as would be expected, last ditch efforts yielded nothing.  Every destination in Asia was already teeming with tourists, and I could not even get a place in the kennel to board Kulfi.  Which left me with plenty of time at home and to explore Singapore...I know precious little about my current abode other than the usual hot spots - office, Din Tai Fung (in the office building), Dempsey Hill, and the German Shepherd Dog Club.  Oh...and Changi Airport. 

Good time to show Rahul this town, thought my wife.  And she came up with a list of places as long as my arm - Arab Street, China Town, National Museum of Singapore, Asian Civilisation Museum, restaurants, movies, and of course the famous zoo!  Not being as ethusiastic about gallvanting, I had other ideas...which mainly revolved around reading, writing, barbequeing and alcohol (the order being very flexible especially with the latter which could overlap/ override all the others!).

As it turned out, the report card at the end of the break did not look very pretty.  My body rebelled against the forced inactivity and I fell ill.  My old friend, bronchial asthma, decided to pay me an overdue visit and I spent the last few days in a haze combating heavy breathing with a doze of steriods and anti-histamines.  The brain refused to function actively and I did not get too far with my literary agenda either.  Barbequeing plans were shelved as they would have made me a prime candidate for being jailed for attempted suicide.  Even though I bravely persisted in partaking of wines and Single Malts, I did not much savour the taste...

I learnt that idle time does not equal relaxation (filed away for future reference).

Sure I got some down time...including an overdoze of the idiot box.  And Kulfi is now definitely better at sitting, staying and heeling...thanks in abundance to coaching by Kabir, the exuberant and immensely knowledgeable President of GSDC in Singapore, who paid us a visit one evening.  Kulfi's coffee table etiquette is still less than elegant though...as was evident that day when, soon after an exhibition of his newly gained skills, he cunningly swooped over the finger food and made off with a bowl of nuts - spoon included, mind you.  I am certain his grand plans included annointing his collar with a table napkin and smacking his lips after a sip of Shiraz had I not rudely interrupted with a quick smack on the muzzle!

Over the years I have developed a strong sense of self preservation from NY resolutions.  Which has been effective through the advent of 2011 as well.  As before, I start the year free of plans and resolve...wishing for nothing more than a chance to lead a life of meaning and purpose...a life less ordinary. 

I wish you the same.

Five months with Kulfi

March 25...Day 1!

The summer months...

Five months later...in action at the German Shepherd Dog Club, Singapore.

Of old friendships...lost and regained

The decision to move to Singapore was taken towards the end of 2007, prompted by a combination of professional and personal factors. My job in India had been one long and exhilarating, yet tiring, journey as our organisatoin grew by leaps and bounds. I had long felt the need for a change and was desirous of learning about new cultures and sharing my experiences with other countries facing similar challenges as I had during my last few years in India. On the personal front, it had simply become unsustainable to continue living in metropolitan India. After three very dangerous and near fatal asthma attacks over a span of two years, I needed to figure out where I had a reasonable chance of survival. Thanks to a very generous organisation, I was not short of options. After considering various locations around the world, I settled upon Singapore...it had proximity to several growing markets across Asia and was a great travel hub. It also had very clean air and a tropical climate that suited my condition. And it was not far from India.

In April, 2008 I began my life in this new country. I was now officially a ‘foreigner’…my identity card had the letters FIN (Foreigner Identification Number) printed on it.

Over two years have passed since then and I have slowly begun to acknowledge changes that have taken place in my life. The first was on the health front, which improved significantly after moving to Singapore. For perhaps the first time, I was able to expand my chest and fill my lungs with air without hearing a wheezing sound. I ran a 5km race within a month of arriving in town. I started exercising and training. The nature of my work and even the workplace changed dramatically. From a noisy and buzzing office in Bangalore that was filled with meetings from morning to night and where every day revealed a new crisis, I was now in a global role where appointments were made and respected, life revolved around conference calls which people diligently prepared for, and my cell phone would ring only occasionally. I traveled to different countries and worked actively with new cultures - learning and advising - and was fascinated to discover similarities and differences from my own.

Outside of work, I sensed some degree of ethnic centricity in how people lived their social lives. They tended to congregate and mingle within familiar boundaries. Indians with other Indians. Chinese with the Chinese. Brits, Aussies and Americans with their like (or 'Caucasians' as they are often referred to in Asia). Not to say that this is all very stark and restrictive, but that is the general picture…

The desire to have a dog grew stronger. It had been many years since I had one running around the house. Constant change of cities and unrelenting work pressure had kept me from making the commitment thus far. But now was really the time, I felt. It would still take two years before a puppy would walk into our house.

There was another realization, which has taken a while to acknowledge and reconcile to. And that was the loss of old friendships. Those that I had grown up with had already dispersed to different parts of the world. Most of my friends were in their early parenting years with lives centering on their progeny. Conversations now were shorter and less intimate.  We were content just to learn that the other was well, or hasten to offer help if needed. Everyone was busy with their careers and managing their households Without even knowing it, our outlooks were becoming divergent. The commonalities - shared desires, activities and aspirations - had shrunk. I was the outlier. The one that had never desired children. Even those that I had been close to the past few years began to drift away, slowly but surely. Now that the context had changed, maybe we just did not have that much relevance in each others existence. I was feeling the effects of my personality and decisions. It had become lonely out there...

But that doesn’t make life gloomy and I am not moping about with a long face. These are just realizations that come with the passage of time and advancing of years…some that one rues at and reminisces, and others that bring a smile on one's face. Like my work, which is pretty intense and offers room for creativity and having a positive impact on people. I constantly get the opportunity to work with new people around the world, both within and outside my company. I travel extensively. There is energy and excitement.

And a new friend at home who is quite a delight!

Health has been great...

Or is that changing again?? In the past month one of my oldest friend’s has reappeared...bronchial asthma! Nothing serious. Just a friendly reminder that he is never too far away... The familiar constriction of the lungs on occasion. Affected sleep. There is suspicion that it may have something to do with our four legged friend…hair being shed from his coat may be triggering off the allergic condition. But we are fortunate to have an outside area for him to live and play in. So we shall keep a close watch.

I am determined to do everything in my power to stay healthy and productive…as I am to experience the joy of a wonderful pet at home. That is not too much to ask out of life, is it?

Bringing up Kulfi

I have been home now for a few days and life has certainly changed with the arrival of little Kulfi.  The desire to be around has intensified and the daily routine has also undergone a change.  Whereas usually the instinct in the morning had been to quickly get ready and productive, the schedule has altered somewhat and I find myself coming down the stairs first and walking into the garden to greet the puppy.  There is no time like the morning when they are at their energetic best and rejoice in their reunion with you, having been separated the entire night. 

On days that I work from home, I find myself taking breaks to check in on Kulfi's antics.  Or just to see if there is sufficient drinking water in his bowl.  In Singapore it is quite typical for heavy clouds to gather in the afternoons and soon there are deafening claps of thunder followed by a spell of heavy rain.  While this provides a respite from the sapping heat, it can be quite scary for young puppies especially if their abode is outdoors, as is the case with our dog.  So when the skies darken and this phenomena unfolds, it is hard not to go out in the rain and peek in to see if all is well with the little fella.  So far, it has been...and it is a relief to find him in peaceful slumber within his kennel even as nature unleashes its song and dance all around.

Over the past few days, the stream of visitors has increased in our house as friends have been dropping by with their children to see and play with the new puppy.  The first six months are an important phase in the development of most dogs during which time they need to become comfortable around people and other dogs...a process called "socialisation" in doggy parlance.  German Shepherds have been bred as working dogs, used extensively by the police and armed forces.  They are known to be fiercely loyal to their masters and are excellent guard dogs.  Hence it becomes critical to socialise them from an early stage.  As of now, Kulfi gives absolutely no signs of aloofness...the treats he has been receiving from these visits may have something to do with it!

Sunday too is different.  It is earmarked for a visit to the German Shepherd Dog Club!  Well before Kulfi's arrival, we had started visiting the club and meeting with people there.  It is located in a quiet part of the city and is a beautiful place with a large expanse of green where dogs can run around.  There is even a pond for them to dive into and swim.  Every Sunday evening dog owners converge there, some for the training lessons and others just to socialise their animals.  During the course of our visits, we gained valuable tips from pet owners on do's and dont's of rearing puppies, besides learning about pet foods, veterinarians, and other essentials.  Sometimes one receives pretty mind boggling advice from a concerned dog owner...like when I was told to feed the pup mineral water for its first few days in Singapore!  I had dogs all through my growing years, but only after moving to Singapore have I learnt the myriad complexities associated with pet ownership.  I wonder how we brought up our dogs without such nuanced understanding of pet behaviour and pet care??  But in general, one comes across pretty knowledgeable and caring folks.  The club is great fun for dog lovers and one gets to see dogs of various breeds sauntering in and running around.  Last week as I drove out from there, it suddenly struck me that I had come across some of the friendliest people in Singapore in this very place.

But puppy rearing is not just fun and games.  Housetraining has its moments of exasperation as the puppy pretty much lets go when and where it pleases, with utter disregard to propriety!  And when teething begins, everything is fair game.  A doggy bone is never an interesting substitute for human limbs, playing tug-of-war with the trouser of your suit in the evening is just a warm welcome home, wooden furniture needs to be worked upon with a carpenters delight...and...the shoes!!  Nothing gives greater satisfaction than the feel of a good 'ol smelly piece of footwear between the teeth.  The look on Kulfi's face when he made off with our banker friend's designer leatherware was, well, priceless!

Oh...its past 5pm.  On Sunday evening.  Time for some woof woof!!

Anticipation!!

March went by in anticipation of an arrival.

Actually it all began in January, soon after a trip we took on the very second day of the new year. Two cars drove up to a beachside kennel-cum-residence of a prize winning breeder of German Shepherd Dogs in Sydney. We were there on an important mission - to check out a prospective family member. Something that required the presence and approval of several of our kin. Not that anyone had much expertise in the job at hand, i.e. in making a selection from 10 day old puppies, but we all took the responsibility seriously anyway. A burly Aussie gent answered the doorbell wearning an expression which could best be described as a mixture of disbelief and exasperation...who were these beaming bunch of Indians in his front yard?? But we got past that. An hour later we drove away, all questions having been satisfactorily answered. We also got to meet some of his prized dogs and take a peek at the new born puppies whose eyes were yet to open. The decision was pretty much made instantaneously, though one would dare not proclaim that ahead of the family huddle...

I have my niece, Rimjhim to thank for this. When I arrived in Australia late in December, the soon-to-be 21 year old was given an assignment - to successfully identify a breeder of GSD's with a recent litter who was also willing and able to export the puppy to Singapore. She was off the blocks in an instant. Starting with the quintessential Google search, she surfaced various options, explored export procedures, spoke to several breeders, and even did a sales pitch on my behalf telling them how well the puppy would be taken care of in faraway Singapore (yes, that matters to most Aussie breeders who are quite patriotic about their dogs). And lo and behold, within 48 hours - a hair's breath away from the Christmas break when everyone and everything shuts down - we had established contact with a well known breeder who had new born puppies. The rest as they say is (modern) history. Rimjhim had nailed this!

After three long months during which my family made another visit to check in on him, and some missed deadlines later, he finally arrived on March 25. Despite all my planning I ended up being in Chicago for a crucial workshop, while he was welcomed by my wife and parents. The transatlantic journey back was longer than usual and the delayed connection from Hong Kong did not help matters either...so it was only at 3am the following Monday when I got my first glimpse. He was there...in my house!! Awake, curious, and tail wagging slowly.

So here he is. Introducing..........Kulfi!!

Barely two weeks down the road, the transformation from puppyhood has begun. The ears have perked up, movement of any kind generates tremendous excitement...and all things animate and inanimate are entirely meant for chewing pleasure!

And the latest discovery this morning...the new paper shredder in my home office!

In search of the holy cow!

I was returning from a game of badminton this weekend when I realised that we have now been living in Singapore for over nine months. The first protracted length of time spent in a country different from the one of my birth, where I grew up and got educated, and where I spent several years of my working life.

I now live in what is commonly described as the first world. A world where refrains such as 'quality of life' or 'standard of living' aquire a definite shape and meaning. During my growing up years in India, these phrases were only niceties, associated with some other, distant world.

There are some obvious differences between the first world and the third world (for that is how India would be classified). Like population. This country has 4.8 million people living in various kinds of abodes, where even the most basic is of a very high standard, and spread over 700 square kilometers. Not a very large area, but the point is about density, not land mass. By contrast, the city where I was born - Delhi - now (officially) has 13 million spread over just about double this area. And another one where I spent four years - our commercial and entertainment capital Bombay (I still cant get my tongue around Mumbai) - has just under 14 million of us crammed into 600 square kilometers.

The next big difference is the traffic. A 20 kilometer commute takes approximately a similar amount of time...and nearly carries you across the breadth of the country and all the way into neighbouring Malaysia! Those of us who have lived in Bombay or Bangalore, as I have, will tell you with exasperation how half that distance often takes double the time. On a good day. Then there is the road ettiquette. One of the pleasing experiences everytime I used to travel from India was the sudden and complete absence of noise on the road. Strangely I discovered that a large number of vehicles were actually able to traverse great distances without creating any ambient noise. But then, I think honking is a feature unique to us Indians...only we can truly appreciate the music produced by the inmates of vehicles...several 100 thumbs pressed in unison over the horn, when they are in a situation of complete and irreversible lockjam occupying every single centimeter of available space! I have been to other places where a similar level of traffic and chaos is not accompanied by high decibel levels. Even in countries that would constitute our third world...one only needs to travel to neighbouring Sri Lanka or to places like Philippines and experience the difference.

Then there is the civic sense and cleanliness. How people are trained to follow rules and have generally accepted norms of public behaviour. Like cleaning their own mess and leaving a public space the way they found it... My new city apparently gets washed top to bottom every single day and sets a high benchmark for the rest of the developed world. Yesterday during a dinner hosted by some expat families on the occassion of the Chinese New Year I leant that there were laws here which required even cars to remain spotlessly clean! Or the standard of civility in dealings with fellow human beings. As an example, it is actually possible to have a conversation with a law enforcement officer. And that the equivalent of the paan chewing robot that issues tickets from behind the dirty glass counter in railway stations in India - the one that is only trained to utter syllables like "Tender exact change, else leave". In the first world, these are human beings capable of dialogue! Sometimes they even smile. Perhaps because on average these citizens earn 25 times what their counterparts in the third world do. You would think that is reason enough to smile...

And of course there are the magnificent buildings, the awe inspiring architecture, wonderful gourmet restaurants, lively pubs and grand shopping complexes selling exotic fares. Speaking of which...I once saw a long queue of people patiently waiting for entry to a store. Upon enquiry, I was told that the wait would last several minutes, perhaps an hour or more. The occassion? Loius Vuitton had a sale on ladies handbags. My previous experiences with long queues were at the immigration checkpoints in overcrowded airports in India. But then those queues were different...there was palpable impatience and irritation in the crowd waiting to board their flights to distant lands. This one was more akin to what I saw many years ago at Vaishno Devi after a gruelling trek of several hours and where pilgrims patiently waited for a glimpse of the deity. I think the beatific expression on people's faces was similar.

However, all these just make for interesting and at times superfluous conversations. The larger point is this - it takes very little for our mind to adjust to material comfort and convenience. And for it to distance itself from difficulties. Which is why scores of people migrate from the third world to the first world. I observe my own experiences...how easily I have come to expect that my commute to office will last a mere 20 minutes, traveling in silence over a well laid out expressway, and on which I drive at 90 kilometers an hour. Or the airconditioned existence I lead, starting from my house to office and including the grocery store, shopping malls, trains, buses and taxis...down to the community gymnasium provided for public well being by the government. I take all these for granted today. And to think that I grew up in a city where the summer temparature would reach a searing 45 degree celcius or more, accompanied by daily power cuts in the middle of the night...and we did not even have an airconditioner till I started working! The feeling of lying in bed drenched in sweat, with the constant buzzing of mosquitos, undeterred by the electric repeller now rendered ineffective, and the endless wait for the fan to start rotating once again. Or sleeping on the dirty floor of the second class sleeper compartment of a train during my student years travelling from Pune to Delhi. All these are distant memories which only surface when deliberately extricated from the deep recesses of my mind. Simply because the mind has been acclimatised to seek comfort and shun its opposite. This, my current existence, is the only reality to covet.

But before I veer further off into the philosophical, I am reminded of a recently and previously undiscovered shortcoming of the first world, without which this account will surely be incomplete. We were seated around the breakfast table in our house and the discussion suddenly came to centre on...milk! My visiting family - parents and mother-in-law - described how the milk here was not quite up to the mark. Attempts to make paneer and curd had failed miserably. Not rich enough, they proclaimed. And then the penny dropped for my mother in law, who is on her maiden overseas voyage. The reason was, she stated with a sparkle in her eyes...that there were no cows in this country! None had been spotted crossing the road!! No wonder the milk lacked potency. It took a while for suspicion to pave way for reason, argued assiduously by the wife...this was super slim milk...specially selected for daily consumption due to its healthy, fat free qualities, etc. Though I suspect she is still not entirely convinced.

I have visions of embarking on a hunt for cows in Singapore to conclusively lay the matter to rest... Which is when the brain again begins to shutdown. At 4am. On the glorious morning of the first day of the Chinese New Year. The year of the Ox! Also Australia Day. And of course, the 60th Republic Day of India. Best wishes to all on January the twentysixth, 2009!